'When I move back here, things are gonna change.'
Really dear brother.....really? Because the way I see it, by the time you get down here it'll be the summer so I wont have many reasons to stay inside the house and have another set of rules, defined by you, to abide by.
I love you dearly and miss you when you're not here. But when you do visit it takes but a few hours for your arrogance to ensue and for me to want to give you a dead arm.
''Go away give me a chance to miss you...''
He only visited for a long weekend. I just wish that he could not be so...so....I can't think of the right word for him. It's not us that are going to have to change when you move back.....it's you. We've made our lives here and we're more than comfortable with how our days intertwine and move around eachother so we fit nicely in our home. It's just me and my parents in the house but we like how our lives work.
Maybe it's just me. I have an unconcious fear of change, the fear of the unknown. Or maybe its my nature to rebel against being told what to do. I hate it. I'm stubborn.
Tell me to do something and I will not do it just to annoy you or tell me I can't do something and I will do it just to prove you wrong.
It's not just my darling brother I'm concerned about.
It's also my eldest sister. It's been wellllll over a year since her fiance split from her and she's still tied to him in any possible way. I try to stay out of it all. I got involved once before and I couldnt stand it any longer. It upset me to watch her self destruction through this adoration she still holds for him. It's true, you can't be complete friends with you ex's. There will always be complicated feelings and frustrations that you can't ressolve. There needs to be time. And a lot of it if you could ever be their friend again. And people between, others that you lent your feelings to so they dont all still belong to that ex when you come to meet them again.
I'm the only single girl in my friendship group...
Yeah I miss having some one to just kiss or to hug for no reason but that's all just a bunch of matter, I think for the moment I'd rather not have the complications.
I'm booked in for next Wednesday with Lloyds Pharmacy....Diabetes test.
It's something that has been in the back of my mind for a while. I've been noticing the classic symptoms for a long time now. I may have worked myself up a little bit but I just want to know now if that's another thing I'm going to have to battle. And if not then that's a little worry off my mind. It's not a big issue for me, I've dealt with needles a lot in the past. Blood tests, Depo injections and Tattoos. So a little prick to the finger shouldnt be so bad. I dont believe I'm a hypochondriac but it is strange how we can get ourselves so worked up when it comes to our health. Maybe its been programmed into us by the media or our over protective parents but it's just another thing on a long list to be concerned about.
more to follow.